FEBRUARY 12, 1932

Full News Archive

• Headline: Austin Art Exhibition Features Oils and Watercolors. Impact: This art exhibition kickstarted the trend of ‘exhibiting anything’ from the mundane to the bizarre. Now, every town has a ‘local artist’ who thinks their cat's fur could be art.. Fact: In a shocking twist of fate, this exhibition led to the rise of art critics who couldn't tell the difference between a masterpiece and a toddler’s finger painting..
• Headline: A Russian's Paintings on View.. Impact: This exhibition opened the floodgates for countless artists to claim their works were inspired by some obscure Russian painter, leading to many 'art critics' scratching their heads in confusion.. Fact: The real irony? The Russian painter probably just wanted to paint landscapes, yet ended up inspiring the next generation of abstract artists who think a blank canvas is deep..
• Headline: LOAN CURB PLAN ATTACKED.; Santiago (Chile) Paper Calls Johnson Bill an Act of Contempt.. Impact: This bill's rejection set off a domino effect of financial regulations that made it nearly impossible for anyone to borrow money without a PhD in bureaucracy. Welcome to the age of financial anxiety!. Fact: Did you know that in the world of finance, calling something an 'act of contempt' is basically the equivalent of a schoolyard bully saying ‘I’m telling!’? Drama much?.
• Headline: Youth Gets $1,500 for Golf Injury.. Impact: This verdict created a precedent where every golfer now feels entitled to compensation for every swing gone wrong, leading to an influx of ‘injured’ golfers claiming emotional distress from losing a match.. Fact: Fun fact: T. Dunford’s injury led to the creation of the first-ever golf injury support group, where members would simply sit around and complain about their bad swings..
• Headline: SEEK BRIDGE COMMUTATION.; Palisades Realty Men to Ask Trip Tickets for Cars on Hudson Span.. Impact: This request for bridge tickets birthed a new era of toll negotiations, resulting in municipalities across the nation trying to outsmart each other with ridiculous toll rates. Welcome to the age of bridge tolls!. Fact: Did you know that bridge tolls are basically the lazy person's way of saying, ‘I want to get to the other side but can’t be bothered to walk’?.
• Headline: $250,000 ASKED FOR INQUIRY.; $100,000 Fee for Seabury Included in Legislative Measure.. Impact: This inquiry and its astronomical price tag sent waves through the legislative world, leading to the belief that every scandal could simply be solved by throwing money at it. Spoiler: it rarely works.. Fact: Fun fact: If you ever need a quick $250,000, just ask a legislative body. They seem to think money grows on trees, or at least in the pockets of taxpayers..