APRIL 17, 1930

Full News Archive

• Headline: Police Hearing on Taximan Incident. Impact: If Schanover had just planted the gun, the entire police department might’ve started a trend in ‘creative evidence’ which would have led to a reality where cops were writing crime novels instead of solving crimes.. Fact: In a world where police officers are also authors, we might have had a bestseller called 'The Framed Gun: A Detective’s Guide to Creative Writing'..
• Headline: Rosenberg Heads $2.6 Million Drive. Impact: This fundraising campaign likely inspired future charity events, leading to the rise of bake sales and awkward charity runs where people don't even know what charity they're running for.. Fact: If only they had known back then that social media would turn every charity event into a competition for who can post the most selfies with sad puppies..
• Headline: Plan Newsprint Hearing in NYC. Impact: The hearing sparked a series of debates on newsprint quality, influencing the eventual rise of online news and a decline in actual reading. Thanks for that, hearing.. Fact: Little did they know, in the future, newsprint would be replaced by blogs filled with cat memes and conspiracy theories..
• Headline: BRITAIN AND SOVIET SIGN TRADE TREATY; Each to Accord Most Favored Nation Treatment to Citizens and Products. IMMUNITY IS PROVIDED Moscow Trade Representative and His Offices in London to Have Diplomatic Privileges.. Impact: The treaty set the stage for future diplomatic friendships that would have nations trading not just goods but also sarcastic insults during negotiations.. Fact: This treaty was probably the first instance of countries realizing that mutual benefits could also be a fancy term for 'Let’s trade our problems instead of solving them.'.
• Headline: LINKS SLAIN GANGSTER WITH 'LEGS' DIAMOND; Newark Detective Chief Says Miller Sent $100 to Entratta-- Denies He Has Solution.. Impact: This incident probably led to an entire generation of detective novels where every character is either a gangster, a gumshoe, or both, further glamorizing crime.. Fact: In the world of organized crime, $100 might have been the equivalent of a large pizza, which is why detectives are always hungry for clues..
• Headline: MET.SWIM RECORD IS SET BY RUDDY; 25-Year-Old Mark in 250-Yard Free Style Is Lowered in N.Y.A.C. Carnival. VICTOR'S TIME IS 2:45 3-5 Pennsylvania Freshman Water Polo Team is Defeated by N.Y. A.C. Juniors, 40 to 7.. Impact: Ruddy’s record might have inspired future swimmers to push their limits, resulting in a world where Olympic swimmers have to wear jetpacks to stay competitive.. Fact: Swimming records are so fast-paced that by the time you finish reading the headline, someone has probably broken it again..
• Headline: ON TRIAL AS DRUG RUNNER.; Jacob Bloom Identified by Employes of lie de France.. Impact: Bloom's trial likely inspired countless movies and TV shows depicting the glamorous yet dangerous lives of drug runners, leading to an increase in people thinking crime is a viable career.. Fact: Ironically, if Jacob Bloom had sold organic produce instead, he might have ended up with a thriving health food business instead of a courtroom drama..
• Headline: ZINC MEN FOR RESEARCH.; Institute Plans Wide Survey as Aid to Industry.. Impact: This research initiative could have inadvertently laid the groundwork for future scientists to explore 'men' in other metals, leading to a bizarre trend in metallurgy-themed reality shows.. Fact: Zinc is actually a vital element for health, but let’s be honest, who knew that ‘Zinc Men’ would never make it to the superhero roster?.
• Headline: THREE CONTRACTS LET IN CITY HOUSING PLAN; Midler Awards Part of Demolition Work in Chrystie-Forsyth Street Development.. Impact: This housing plan kickstarted a series of urban developments that would eventually lead to the modern-day obsession with tiny homes and overly complicated IKEA furniture.. Fact: Demolishing old tenements might have seemed like a good idea, but it also paved the way for future generations to complain about rising rents and lack of character in new buildings..
• Headline: REFUSE TO INCREASE CHINESE MEMBERSHIP; Shanghai Foreign Taxpayers Reject Move to Enlarge theMunicipal Council.. Impact: This refusal perhaps set a precedent for future councils everywhere to maintain the status quo, leading to generations of bureaucratic stagnation and endless debate over the same issues.. Fact: If only they’d known that in the future, people would be using social media hashtags to resolve council disputes instead of actual meetings..